A few years back, while I was busy making a career for myself in the Air Force, I saw a large number of fat, lazy, living off their husband housewives. That was my opinion, solidified by the complaints of my coworkers, their husbands.
7 years, one early, unexpected discharge later. My opinion has changed. I never planned on being a stay at home mom. I planned on finishing 9 more years. I did have a few women friends who weren’t the slatternly housewifely types. My friend, Michele, was the most notable. Her house is always clean, if not picked up. Her boys participate in sports and do so many fun things my head spins. I respect her for being the hang in there, can do anything mom that I would like to be. Of course, she made it look easy. Why couldn’t all moms be like her?
My twins appeared unexpectedly two months early. We spent 2 months in the NICU, and I got discharged from the Air Force to stay home and take care of two sick babies. I was given strict instructions to keep them home, in a clean environment for the next 9 months. I strove to keep a clean house. I knew that somewhere in between the feedings, the cloth diaper laundry, my 6 yo’s homework, cooking dinner, nap time, baths, bed time, and chatting with my hubby, I should be able to clean. Riggggghhhhht.
6 years later, my husband cooks dinner. My 12 yo has chores and does his own homework. I can manage the laundry with the help of all my boys. We all clean the house for 30 minutes everyday. I do heavy cleaning when I get the chance. The twins do their homework at 3, with my help. My hubby usually does the dishes. My house still isn’t perfect. I don’t watch daytime tv. I watch the other moms volunteering at the school, and think if I only had more time…
I’ve learned why there are so many fat housewives, because now, I’m one of them. We get our workouts when we can, eat our meals when we can, and rest when we can. Its not a healthy way of life, unless you make a concerted effort to take care of yourself. I’m still working on that. Michele and the other terrific moms I’ve gotten to know, all struggle with this.
It was easier in the Air Force. I had a job, I had friends. I got to talk to adults all day. I’d come home and help my only son do his homework, fix dinner and then watch tv with him. He and I could go shopping, go to a movie, go for a walk. I worked out three times a week, on the clock. I didn’t know just how good I had it 🙂 I do now. I also know that I’m a heck of a lot less judgemental since I took off my combat boots for the last time.